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Beware of Frustration Escalation A friend of mine and his wife were watching as a man was giving the dock girl at a very nice resort, a horrifically bad time as she was trying to help him dock his boat. She was being very polite, courteous and helpful - it wasn't her fault he couldn't maneuver his boat in a "seamanlike" manner. He seemed to think it was. She finally got him tied up, or rather the boat tied up, and he still continued his harangue. Having watched this abusive ordeal, my friends wife calmly walked over to the man, interrupted his tirade and asked him, "Are you a lawyer?" "No," he said. "Can you swim?" she said. "Yes," he said "Good," she said as she calmly pushed him off the dock and into the refreshing waters of our beautiful San Juans. Needless to say, we can't go around pushing rude people into the water, although I'm sure there isn't one of us that hasn't wished to do so at one time or another. Besides, during high season, all the bodies in the water would present a hazard to navigation. Just kidding of course, but it does get a bit frustrating sometimes, having some bozo needlessly disrupting what could and should be another enjoyable time on the water. And that's what it's all about - frustration. One person's frustration leads to another's frustration and there you have it - frustration escalation. Pretty soon what starts out as one man's lack of control (I was going to say man or woman but it will probably be a man, sorry guys) leads to louder and louder exchanges until, well, you get the picture. But frustration escalation is not limited to boater versus boater. The most serious kind can be festering right in your own boat. How many times do we see a minor irritation turn into a big blow up, filling the boat with tension and ruining what should be another fine day? True, it's irritating when the pressure water doesn't work, depthfinder always reads six feet, and the spinnaker really should be in the air, not around the keel. Now sinking, that's a big problem. But other than that, all these other things can be dealt with with calm and good humor. Besides, they usually make the best stories for later. So, if somebody is anchored in your favorite spot, or maybe the day hasn't gone quite like you'd hoped, relax. The good things far outweigh the bad, so enjoy the time you've got. But then there's those people who run their generators all night... |
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